A Heart Project by Siobhan Bedford
#55 Wheel of the Mind | Bonded
SIZE: 5″ X 5″
TASK: To appreciate108 moments with loved ones undeterred by the “panic”
BONDED TO: Diane Kremer
DATE: 12/24/2015
Two years ago…
It was Christmas Eve and I posted “Have Heart“, the very first of the 108 Mandalas for this project. Now, there are 54 Mala Makers, who have a colorful circle hanging on their wall, inspiring them in some way to keep living from their heart.
Tonight, I’m heading into the second half of my heart project posting this Wheel of the Mind mandala.
Back in November, I received an email about the task, from the Day of the Dead mandala… “To be mindful of 108 moments you are alive with the ones you love”. The email came from a childhood friend, Diane, sharing about the panicky feeling that can come up when you realize that life is changing. Lately, we’ve both had the feelings that come up when physical death or even death of a phase of of life come to mind. Like a wheel it keeps your thoughts turning.
You know this feeling.
The sinking shiver that goes through you, when you pick up the phone and the voice on the other end tremors, as your ear tries to absorb the word “diagnosed”. Or, that clinging sensation that you feel in the back of your throat when a little one grows up and goes out into the big world on their own. Then, you see that those who have always been there for you seem to have suddenly gone gray. You try not to think about the goodbye that is coming and will last forever. It makes your heart hurt.
If, you’ve ever spun on this wheel of panic you know it can sometimes get in the way of appreciating the sweet moments. I wish there was a way to avoid these panicky feelings but the only thing I know, is to pay attention when they happen. Let them wake you up. Let them become energy that inspires you to make the most of your moments.
“I pray this winter be gentle and kind–a season of rest from the wheel of the mind. ”
–John Geddes
The Mandala Mala Project 
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